Revival
I've, once again, revived yet another blog. This might not even last 10 posts but I suppose this one won't ever reach the eyes of many. Just needed an avenue to reconcile my thoughts, emotions and feelings. Diaries are too gay and writing's such a chore, well I guess blogs would be the best alternative then.
Life has been hectic and taxing so far.
Suddenly in the last year of your possible schooling life (apart from university that is) one starts realising how much he has done and how much he has not. Thinking of impressions you want to leave behind, legacies, memories that you know would be etched forever in your minds especially within the dying moments of school life. The irony it feels when at the start of your schooling 'career' you cant wait to see the end of it, The freedom that awaits and less rigidity and structure in your life, but when your finally nearing the end of it, you wish it could be longer, that it would never end that perhaps if possible the rest of your lives be like this because you are afraid of what comes after of the uncertainties the sudden loss of structure.
I've lost drive and passion towards what used to be the core of all my values and beliefs. Rugby has always been a sport i enjoy playing and being a part of but in recent weeks, this passion is slowly flickering away. I dont know being the captain of RJ rugby team, I never thought it would be as tough a job. With the backlog carried on from the RI days, to win the Championship seems a far cry that is in fact there for the taking. Its hard thinking of the outcome of the team, finally after 6 long years, that I have worked so much for, helped so much for in trying to keep in tact and as a team.
Its easy to teach someone technical skills, be it knowledge or skills. Trying to instill character and beliefs is much harder. What we lacked in the last 5 years, we gotta get back in the next month. Garganutan, mammothic, massive responsibility and task to carry but I know I'm not the kind of guy who shirk away from responsibilities.
Common Tests in 15 days and preperation has been bullocks. My mind's so preoccupied with rugby that it seems there isn't much time for studying. Start tomorrow I guess hitting the book at opportunities that come! Procrastination. Just screwing me up as well.
Thats about it for now. Will update if I feel like it though.
Love,
Anwaar